Isaac Dawson (khover) wrote in schlock_whores,
Isaac Dawson

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Today my friend Sam and I went to Cold Rock Ice Creamery. Here's how it went down.

I walked in to the woosh of chilly chilly air, trailed by Maxine. My skin was like crispy bacon dripping in grease or in this case sweat. The sun outside was blazing like my love for edible panties. The flaming atmosphere reminded me of my first true love. He was so sensitive and caring and he always cuddled but never pressured me for sex. He was perfect, very stylish and was friends with girls and boys. He got along really well with boys. He had a good heart. Anyway back to my story. The sign outside had lured me in like the sign outside an ice creamery lures a fatman. As I fully immersed myself in the cold atmosphere that was cold rock, My heart started to pulsate erratically with anticipation, my toes curled and my members quivered. I knew then that I was having an out of body experience. Either that or my first orgasm. Well actually my first orgasm was with my first true love. He was so loving and after every time we made love he’d just cuddle me and weep softly. It was so romantic. I waddled closer to the inhumane glass enclosure that trapped the delectable ice creams. I press my fingertips lightly to the glass and sigh in delight.
That was when I first set eyes upon Peanut Butter Chocolate Swirl, evidently my second true love. It was the second most romantic experience ever (see above) as it called to me “Sammy….. Sammmmmyyyyy….. Come for me Sammy!!!” I was so enamored, standing there pressed against the glass pane, sweat trickling down the smooth surface like lard dripping off my waxen body while on a treadmill. I leaned in ever so slowly, my tongue lolling out like a newborn kitten escaping the confines of the womb. The glass was cold to the touch of my tongue but it soon warmed up and my swollen lips were able to bear down on the polished transparent cell with no qualms. As I got more invigorated, my body started to gyrate.
Before I knew it my shirt was lying in the Lemon Sorbet, my bra in the White Chocolate and my leggings in the Australian Vanilla. My panties had already been eaten in desperation on my trek to the wondrous Cold Rock. Strangely, Peanut Butter Chocolate Swirl had completely melted while the other flavours were still in tact. A warm sensation had flooded my person and I was in a state of euphoria as I writhed on the surprisingly clean tiles. It was then that I looked up and saw the clerk, various patrons and a few small horses staring at me in horror, mouths agape. Maxine had long abandoned me in an attempt to regain some dignity and, I later found out, a quickie with an ambulance driver on a stretcher. I sheepishly gathered my clothes and a complimentary taste tester, thanked the clerk for his hospitality and dashed out the doors, touching them as I scrambled onto my feet in the sweltering sun. I suddenly spotted a sign for gelati…
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